Summer Vacation

I think that one long summer vacation is much better then a lot of short vacations.

There are few reasons I thought like this. First, the children have to learn outside of school. After the entrance of the school, they have only 2 days holiday per a week. So they don’t know what they could do outside of school. They could study by their pace. They could fine their hobby. I think it takes long time.

Second, in the summer, a lot of creatures are born. This is good for children to know the importance of one’s life. For example, the cicada, that is born into the soil. On their larval periods, they are living only into the soil. It took 7 or 8 years. However after that period, they will come out to the ground. But they could live only 2 weeks. I think this is good time to know such things.

Third, one long summer vacation gave the children that to spend time with their family. On usually, the children could eat breakfast and dinner with their family only on weekend. But, if they have summer time, they could spend all the time with their family. What’s the more, they could trip to far away like abroad.

For this reason, I think the children need one long summer vacations.

4 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    advcomp said,

    > I think that one long summer vacation is much better then a lot of short vacations.
    typo error?: then

    > There are few reasons I thought like this.
    This is not English.

  2. 2

    advcomp said,

    > First, the children have to learn outside of school.
    What do they learn?
    > After the entrance of the school, they have only 2 days holiday per a week.
    After entering the school?
    At school, they have
    2 days holiday –> 2 day holiday
    I think we call this ‘weekends?’
    > So they don’t know what they could do outside of school.
    This is not convincing
    > They could study by their pace.
    when?
    > They could fine their hobby.
    fine –> is not good here
    extend? enrich?
    > I think it takes long time.
    to do what?

  3. 3

    advcomp said,

    > Second, in the summer, a lot of creatures are born.
    OK
    > This is good for children to know the importance of one’s life.
    Summer is the best time for the children to know
    > For example, the cicada, that is born into the soil.
    Make a sentence
    which is the subject and the verb of this sentence?
    use of ‘For example’ is awkward
    > On their larval periods, they are living only into the soil.
    into the soil?
    > It took 7 or 8 years.
    why ‘took?’
    > However after that period, they will come out to the ground.
    Use of However with a comma – a must
    > But they could live only 2 weeks.
    after coming out of the soil
    > I think this is good time to know such things.
    This is one of a few examples, which children can observe the nature and their creatures

  4. 4

    advcomp said,

    > Third, one long summer vacation gave the children that to spend time with their family.
    Why ‘gave’ in the past tense?
    gives 人 物 - 構文が成立していません。
    This does not have English structure.
    > On usually, the children could eat breakfast and dinner with their family only on weekend.
    On usually –> not an English phrase
    weekend+S
    > But, if they have summer time, they could spend all the time with their family.
    summer time –> free summer time/ a long summer vacation
    > What’s the more, they could trip to far away like abroad.
    trip –> I do not think it is a ‘verb.’
    > For this reason, I think the children need one long summer vacations.
    reason+S
    this v.s. these

    全体の論理の説得性が弱いです。


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